120+ Anti Pick Up Lines (Best, Funny, Clever)

When it comes to flirting and dating, pick-up lines have long been a go-to for many people. But let’s face it, most pick-up lines are cheesy, predictable, and often ineffective. In recent years, there has been a growing trend of “anti pick-up lines” that aim to flip the script and poke fun at the whole idea of using pre-made lines to impress someone.

These lines are often witty, irreverent, and refreshing, and can be a great way to break the ice with someone without coming across as insincere or desperate.

In this blog post, we’ll explore the world of anti pick-up lines, and share some of the best examples to try out next time you find yourself in a flirting situation. So put down your tired old pick-up lines, and let’s get ready to laugh and have some fun!

Best Anti Pick Up Lines

• Excuse me, do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.
• Are you a magician? Because every time I try to predict what you’re going to say, I’m always wrong.
• I’m not saying you’re the best catch, but I think I might be allergic to you.
• Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I’m searching for, except a way to turn off the ads.
• If you were a fruit, you’d be a fineapple. But I don’t really like fruit, so…
• I’m not a photographer, but I can picture us not dating.
• Are you a parking ticket? Because you have “fine” written all over you.
• You must be a broom, because you swept me off my feet… and now I’m covered in dust and debris.
• I don’t have a library card, but do you mind if I check you out?
• You’re like a dictionary, except instead of words, you’re full of bad ideas.
• Are you an angel? Because you’re making me want to sin.
• I’m not sure if you’re a genie, but you just granted my wish to never talk to you again.
• You remind me of a sunset. Beautiful to look at, but ultimately fleeting and meaningless.
• Are you a vampire? Because I can’t seem to get away from you.
• You’re like a broken pencil, pointless and not worth my time.
• Do you have a name, or can I call you “regret”?
• I don’t know if you’re a lawyer, but I’m pretty sure I’m being framed for something just by talking to you.
• If you were a superhero, your power would be making me feel uncomfortable.
• You must be a ghost, because you keep haunting me even though I never invited you over.
• I’m not sure if you’re a scientist, but I feel like I’m being experimented on just by being in your presence.
• You must be a baker, because you’re giving me some serious crumbs to work with.
• Are you a time traveler? Because I feel like I’m about to get a glimpse into my future as a single person.
• I’m not a weatherman, but I can predict that you’re going to be a disaster.
• You’re like a black hole, sucking all the joy and happiness out of the room.
• Are you an alien? Because you’re out of this world… and I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing.
• You’re like a cactus, prickly and not worth getting close to.

Funny Anti Pick Up Lines

• I’m not a mathematician, but I’m pretty sure this conversation isn’t adding up to anything.
• Are you a bank loan? Because you’re not really my type, but I have a feeling I’m going to end up with you anyway.
• I’m not sure if you’re a doctor, but talking to you is making me feel sick.
• You’re like a traffic jam, going nowhere and making me late for something more important.
• Do you have a sunburn, or are you always this hot and uncomfortable to be around?
• I’m not a painter, but I think I can do a better job of expressing my disinterest in you with a blank canvas.
• Are you a fisherman? Because you’re reeling me in with all your fake compliments and canned jokes.
• “Hey, I don’t have a library card, but can I check you out?”
• “Are you a magician? Because every time I look at you, everyone else disappears.”
• “Excuse me, but I think you dropped something…my jaw.”
• “Do you have a map? I got lost in your eyes.”
• “I’m not a photographer, but I can definitely picture us together.”
• “Is it just me, or do we have some kind of chemistry here? Like, the kind of chemistry that’s in a bottle and labeled ‘do not ingest’.”
• “You must be a thief, because you just stole my heart.”
• “Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.”
• “Can I follow you home? Cause my parents always told me to follow my dreams.”
• “Excuse me, I think you dropped something: my jaw.”
• “I must be a snowflake, because I’ve fallen for you and I’m terrified of commitment.”
• “I don’t have a library card, but do you mind if I check you out?”
• “Do you have a map? Because I just got lost in your eyes.”
• “Excuse me, but I think you dropped something…my heart.”
• “Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just hurt myself falling for you.”

Short Anti Pick Up Lines

• “Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, I smile.”
• “Excuse me, can you help me out? I’m trying to find my way into your heart.”
• “I may not be a genie, but I can make your dreams come true.”
• “I must be a snowflake, because I’ve fallen for you and I’m uniquely fragile.”
• “Can I borrow your phone? I want to call heaven and tell them I found an angel.”
• “Are you a magician? Because every time I see you, everyone else disappears.”
• “Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just fell for you and scraped my heart.”
• “Can I buy you a drink, or would you rather just have the money?”
• “I must be lost, because heaven is a long way from here and I think I’ve found it in your eyes.”
• “Excuse me, do you have a name or can I call you mine?”
• “Do you have a map? Because I want to get lost in your eyes forever.”
• “Are you a bank loan? Because you have my interest.”
• “Are you a beaver? Because daaaaaam.”
• “Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’ve been searching for.”
• “Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just fell for you and hurt my ego.”
• “Do you have a sunburn or are you always this hot?”
• “I must be a snowflake, because I’ve fallen for you and I’m a little bit flaky.”
• “Are you a wifi signal? Because I’m feeling a strong connection.”
• “Excuse me, do you have a name or can I call you mine?”
• “Do you have a map? Because I just got lost in your eyes and I need directions back to reality.”
• “Are you a magician? Because whenever I see you, everyone else disappears.”
• “Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just hurt myself falling for you and I need medical attention.”
• Are you an alien? Because you’re out of this world…and not in a good way.
• Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because I’ve heard that’s not a pleasant experience.
• Is your name Google? Because you’re not what I was searching for.

Cheesy Anti Pick Up Lines

• Do you have a map? Because I’m lost and I’m pretty sure you are too.
• Excuse me, but I lost my number. Can I have yours instead? Actually, nevermind, I don’t want it.
• Is your dad a thief? Because I’m missing some of my self-respect and I think he took it.
• Do you have a sunburn, or are you just always this red?
• Can I have a picture of you so I can show Santa what I don’t want for Christmas?
• I must be a snowflake, because I’m not interested in you.
• Did you fall from the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down?
• Are you a parking ticket? Because you have no appeal.
• Can I borrow a quarter? I want to call my mom and tell her I just met someone I’m not interested in.
• Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just scraped my knee…and I’d rather talk about that than talk to you.
• Are you a magician? Because you make all my interest in you disappear.
• Do you come here often? Because I’d like to know when to avoid this place.
• Can I have your name? So I know who to avoid in the future.
• Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
• Is it hot in here or is it just my complete lack of interest in you?
• Excuse me, but I think you dropped something – my interest in talking to you.
• Are you a bank loan? Because you have no interest.
• You must be a parking ticket because you have no substance.
• Do you have a map to your personality? Because I’m lost.
• I’d offer you a cheesy pick-up line, but you’re too smart for that.
• Are you a camera? Because I’m not posing for a picture with you.
• I don’t have a library card, but do you mind if I check you out anyways? Actually, nevermind.
• Excuse me, but I think you’re standing on my interest in you.
• Is there a magnet in your pocket? Because I’m not attracted to you.

Dirty Anti Pick Up Lines

• Are you from Tennessee? Because I’m not coming with you.
• Are you a microwave? Because you’re not turning me on.
• Is it just me or are you completely uninteresting?
• Do you have a twin? Because I’d like to avoid both of you.
• Can I buy you a drink? Oh wait, nevermind, I don’t want to waste my money.
• Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just scratched my disinterest in you.
• Are you a magician? Because I don’t see the point in talking to you.
• Is it hot in here or is it just the complete lack of chemistry between us?
• Excuse me, but I’m pretty sure you’re not my type…or anyone’s type for that matter.
• Can I have your number? Actually, nevermind, I’d rather be celibate for life.
• Is your name Waldo? Because I don’t want to find you.
• “Excuse me, do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes, and I’m starting to feel like I’m trespassing.”
• “Is it hot in here or is it just the cringe-worthy pick-up lines I keep hearing?”
• “If I told you that you have a great body, would you hold it against me? Please don’t, I’m allergic to restraining orders.”
• “I must be a snowflake, because I’ve fallen for you and I’m melting under the pressure.”
• “Excuse me, but is your name Wi-Fi? Because I’m really feeling a strong connection right now.”
• “Do you have a Band-Aid? I just hurt myself falling for your nonexistent pick-up line.”
• “Hey, can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas? Hint: it’s a restraining order against creepy pick-up lines.”
• “I must be a magician, because every time I see you, everyone else disappears.”
• “Are you an angel? Because your pick-up line just gave me a migraine.”
• “Excuse me, but do you have any raisins? No? Well, how about a date instead?”
• “Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again and let you have a second chance to make a good first impression?”
• “Excuse me, but do you have a name, or can I call you mine?”
• “Do you have a map? I’m lost, and I need directions to the nearest anti pick-up line convention.”

Related Reading:

• 120+ Flood Pick Up Lines (Best, Funny, Clever)
• 120+ Cold Weather Pick Up Lines (Dirty & Cheesy)
• 140+ Hot Weather Pick Up Lines (Best, Funny, Clever)

Kirsten Mayra

I am Kirsten Mayra. I’m a social media enthusiast and writer. Here I love to write Pick Up Lines about various categories. If you have any questions. Drop us an Email.